Marriage Chronicles III
What's good family? I really appreciate all of you who have stopped by and gave the blog some love. Keep coming through and definitely leave some comments. I'm very much open to responses and would appreciate them.
Sorry for my delay in pt. III of Marriage Chronicles. For those who are visiting for the first time, I've decided to blog about my experience leading up to marriage and experiences/lessons learned while in marriage. Since I can't have a camera follow me around for a reality show on vh1, I'll have to settle for blogging. HA! Anyway, on pt. II, I left off with me apologizing to Veronica after years and years of running in and out of her life. The one most important thing I left out was what else I told her. I was real bold with this one. I told her, "I'M NOT GETTING BACK WITH YOU UNLESS I'M GOING TO MARRY YOU." WHOA! That's serious! That's one of those NBA Playoff GUARANTEED WIN statements. Our courtship begins. This is where it gets pretty interesting because at this stage, everything counts. Every little thing was a "sign" or an "indicator" to what should be expected in the future for the both of us as a spouse. This is the time where ALL the critical questions were asked like, "What makes you believe you're ready to be a husband/wife? Why do you want to be my husband/my wife? Where do you want to live? How many kids do you want and what names are you considering?" MAN, THIS WAS ALOT NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT! LOL
The best part, I would say, about our courtship is 1) how we spent our time and 2) how it grew my FAITH. Veronica and I tried with all of our hearts to spend most of our time strategically; not just scheduling things but when and where they are taking place. The reason why we were so BIG on this was because it's so easy to get BOUNDARIES confused during this time. We didn't want to be that couple playing "house". You know what I'm talking about too; playing marriage like spending entire days with one another and staying over each other's house overnight; need I say more? NOT THE BUSINESS! It's so easy for couples to reach that point of saying, "Okay, we both know we want to marry each other so why not..." "Why shouldn't I be allowed to stay over your house? Why shouldn't I be able to touch on you the way I wish? I mean, you are about to be my husband or wife." Mind you, we haven't even gotten engaged yet (then those thoughts/ideas/feelings only grow). So, the majority of the time we spent together either was out and about (not in one of our houses and if we were, it was during the day/early evening and we were cooking most of the time. LOL, where i learned how to make lasagna), over someone else's house visiting (especially one of our mentor couples or spending time with our goddaughters), or out with mutual friends or family. We grew alot from that. The 2nd best part is how it grew my faith. AND IT DEFINITELY DID JUST THAT! About a year into our courtship, I knew I wanted to go ahead and take that leap of faith, but I found myself stuck at the edge squatting and swinging my arms back and forth. LOL, I had somethings lingering in the back of my mind. You know? The usual things like, "Where are we going to live? I don't have enough money. What if I fail as a husband?" Two people really challenged me with 2 simple questions. One was my mentor and we were talking about finances and his question was, "How much is enough?" The other question was from this gentleman I was discipling; "What makes you think God won't take care of you and V if He gave you the green light to marry her?" It stumped me because I couldn't answer either of them! Talk about feeling shutdown?!!?!?! I know that wasn't the purpose of either question, but both really put things in perspective. I had to ask God for forgiveness and for my arrogance of doubting Him and trying to do things on my own.
From that point on, things began to happen like I've never seen before. Things began to fall into place better than I could have ever planned!
Pt. IV coming soon and I promise I won't make you wait as long...